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Tuesday, May 18, 2010

The Joys of Oral:)

Pretty self explanatory, right?
"Those that give shall receive."
What just amazes me is you have dudes who will pressure a girl sooo much to get her to give him oral, but if she asks for oral he goes off trying to make the girl look stupid "Hell nah you must be out yo fuckin' mind. That's fucking disgusting"
Fine, if you don't want to do it, and you're set in your ways, so be it.
But don't think you should have any right to demand a girl give you head if you're not willing to return the favor.
That was my mini rant of the night, now on to the good stuff:)

I'm clearly writing this part for my ladies, so I'm willing to look through my repertoire and share a few tips and tricks with you guys:)

FIRST OFF, you have to be in the mindset to wanna do it. No guy wants a half assed blow job. Think about Lil'Kim:

"I used to be scared of the dick; now I throw lips to the shit, handle it, like a real bitch."

That's the mindset you need.

You can start at the lips, down the neck, down the chest, and then a few teasing kisses around his dick (For those who are scared to just whip it out and go to town lol). And you don't have to take the whole thing at first. Just start with kissing the head, a few licks, then get to sucking. Like I said in my other blog, don't be scared to use your hands while you're giving head. And teeth? Some dudes like it, most I know don't. Don't be so overzealous that you forget and bite him. You may incite a violent reaction. #NoBueno.

***What I like to do if I'm in front of him, I use my hand along with my mouth, alternating between licks and sucks. I'll occasionally suck all the way to the tip, it makes this *pop* noise when I bring my mouth off of it. Then I make a tight fist @ the base and pull down so the skin is taut, and flick my tongue sideways across the frenulum (aka that skinny strip of skin on the other side of the head.)
***Or if I'm sitting on top of him then that allows me to use my free hand to tickle zee testicles lol. I stroke em, squeeze em (not too tightly tho).

Confession: if his balls are shaved, I'm always tempted to lick them...idk why...but then again I've only come across one guy who's junk was completely shaved. Noone wants to lick hairy balls, FYI...

I always get a question about this...
All I can really say is you can't have a sensitive gag reflex (I envy women with little to no gag reflex)
But if you wanna do it, I have a little cheat:)

Comfortably Numb is my best friend. It works:) Just make sure you use it a little beforehand. It takes a while to fully take the numbing effect.
Then what I do is I lay on the bed, with my head dangling over the edge. Then he stands in front of me and Viola! No embarrassing gags:)

Okay, so you're doing one helluva job, he's into it. REALLY into it.
Moaning, heavy breathing, he's practically fucking your face. Uh-oh, this means semen is coming!!! What do you do?!
Please, please, PLEASE determine where the um, "projectile" is going to go beforehand.
Your gent is NOT mind reader. If you don't speak up, he may just assume you want it in your mouth.

FYI to the Gents: you should ask ahead of time, cause if you don't and you proceed you release, she may just bite your penis off.

I don't and I won't ever swallow. Non-negotiable. Sorry. That's just me though. Some girls like the taste of cum (See Kat Stacks). If you wanna finish in my mouth, fine. Just don't expect me to eat your kids for breakfast. That said, there are alternatives that I'm cool with, ie body shots. It would also be an added bonus if you wiped me down afterwards too lol.
***One thing to do is to suck EXTRA hard while he's cumming. He will thank you. Trust me.

I don't want her to think I suck dick at eating pussy.
Hahaha it happens...
For those who are man enough to admit they like eating pussy (and the secretly closeted few) I have some advice to offer. Things that I know I like:
***When you rock your face from side to side. I had someone do this on a cold day and the warmth from his face felt AWESOME.
***Don't be afraid to tongue fuck her. Its a different feeling and bet she's never had it done properly.
***Some girls like to have their lips sucked on. Don't be shy:)
***If you're down there and just completely clueless ass to what to do, spell her name with your tongue, suck a few times, then spell your name, repeat. It's foolproof.

Things NOT to do:
***Blow air in her. You will kill her with a deadly air embolism. And we don't want that.
***Use your teeth. For the same reason you don't like teeth scraping across your dick.
***Treat my clit like a PlayStation joystick. Stop mashing and trying to rotate it. Its sensitive and that shit hurts. You are not playing a game of Grand Theft Auto, you're trying to please me.

FLASHBACK: I was having car sex one night, and when he went down on me he slid two fingers in me and did this "Come hither" thing with his fingers an sucked on my clit at the same time...AMAZEBALLS!!! Stroking the G-Spot (they DO exist. Well, at least MINE does...) and clitoral stimulation? Good for you, Glen Coco.

If you're being a weenie about giving head to your girlfriend though, please refer to "Miss Sixxxty Gives Advice"

What else...
Oh yeah!

The vibrating tongue ring:)
Don't let the name fool you.
The vibrations are powerful as hell, some people can't handle having it in their mouths.
You can always give the same effect by humming, And if you don't wanna sound stupid while you do it, have some mood music playing in the background:)
And you can't replace the battery (at least not in this one) so you have to keep buying more when the battery dies.

Can't think of anything else I care to share...
He knows who he is, he made my day:)
Send me more emails @

In honor of tonight's topic, I will bless you with two hw assignments:

For the babes:

Courtesy of
Heeeeey, it has a name!

For the Gents:

Courtesy of
I'd like to have my hands planted on a wall to brace myself

Happy munching:)
Miss Sixxxty, your very own freak of the industry

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