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Tuesday, May 31, 2011

A Few Things...

I'm forcing myself to get this out before midnight lol. All the shit I've been getting myself into should make for a very interesting june if I do say so myself...
As you guys know SOMEONE has put a gag order on me from blogging about him...but if what he said to me a few days ago was true...be prepared to be imploded with everything you've missed. And I mean EVERYTHING. if thats the case...from this point on I am not giving a flying fuck about what he says if we're not speaking I dont owe anybody SHIT:)

Things on my mind...
Don't play the role if you dont want the title...and by that I mean if we're not together, if we just hook up occasionally...theres really no need for cupcaking...not my style I feel kinda suffocated. I go see you, say "hey", hit me with the wham bam thank you sam, I'll thank you for your time and dip. And I only said 3 words to you lol. Idk that's just how I work. Unless you LIKE me like me dont wine an dine me.

Foreplay. Learn it. Live it. Apply it. And that doesn't mean just making out before sex or just kissing my neck. Get creative.

I'm getting my touch back:) this is fucking great. Now just cause I'm fucking great doesn't mean the dudes I've come across have been:( thats probably the only downfall. And I'm not about to find THAT one who can blow my back out thru trial and error. A waste of my fucking time. I can wait I guess.

I told you I was two ass slaps away from raping my work spouse right? Welp, lemme just say that man has another thing coming to him. Idk if anyone else has experienced sexual tension this great before but let me tell you it SUCKS. Being inches away from someone and wanting to rip their clothes off and riding them to sheer bliss and knowing you can't. Ughhhh hun there's nothing but space and opportunity now...watch your back (;

Pubes. I dont know how many times I can say this. I hate them. Hence why I dont have any. And I'd prefer if you didn't have any either. And if you do I won't say anything to your face but just know in my mind i'm just like "Mmm. How YOU dewin..." (not gay shade tho...just like I'm raising my eyebrow and judging you to the fullest lol)

Something I've realized...dicks always look bigger if you look at them from the bottom up thanks to ball sacks. So your best bet to not be fooled is to look from the top down. On full mast. ViolĂ . I've been fooled many a times before and couldn't figure out why...then one day I was looking at a dick and BAM it hit me like a ton of bricks. I was wondering why it was smaller than I remember...now I know. So funny when dudes think they're hung when they're really only average...

The club is going great. absolutely hilarious what men will do for a fantasy...there's also this adorable security guard there. He's such a nerdball its so cute. He wears glasses and watches dragon ball Z...i can't wait to corrupt his ass...

I am in severe need of a deep tissue ass massage...

He's a good kisser...and he will stay a secret until the coast is clear:)

....just thinking about all the shit I got myself into this weekend makes me smile...i'm such a bad girl...

I'll add some stuff later and some homework too when I get to the computer.

Tata for now :)
Miss Sixxxty, your very own freak of the industryy
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Tuesday, May 24, 2011

Take A Fucking Hint.

Babes an Gents I haven't verbally castrated anyone in who knows how long, but tonight, that ends NOW. Why dudes from the past insist on rearing their ugly heads i have no fucking idea.

First we have this dude from my high school. Apparently we were passing notes in class one day and according to him I said that I "want a nigga to beat the guts". Let me tell you I have never IN MY LIFE told someone I wanted them to beat my guts. But I understood what he meant. He was all butt hurt that I was DTF in high school (which I probably wasn't but just passing the time in class) and now, ALL OF A SUDDEN (3 years later) I don't want him to. Umm...really?? If I was REALLY serious about fucking you I would've made something happen by NOW. It's not that hard for two consenting adults to set something up, hell I fuck happenis in the backseat on the regular. BOY BOO. Have multiple seats down sir. Anyways, we all know I dance (or at least we should know by now) and I posted a pic of my earnings on FB. He messages me on fb asking ifI'm a stripper (I think dancer sounds better but w/e) I said yeah and he tells me his friend's 22nd birthday is coming up and if I do private shows. For you? Sikeeeeee ya mamaaaaaa. If I wanted to do private shows I would have been dancing a loooooong ass time ago. I told myself if I ever did this it would be inside a club. I felt some type of way about showing up at strangers houses...but yeah I told him the first part and he was like don't do it on the regular just for one night and I said "mm, no thank you".

"Step yo game up"

Oh good golly gosh I wasn't aware stepping my game up meant doing a private show! How ever will I manage by just working at the club?? *wipes sweat off brow* Then he goes on this tangent:

"A stripper tht dnt like money, they must hire ne one tht wanna shake a lil ass. Maybe I should open my own club for low budget females who wanna shake a lil ass"

Umm, no sir its just you couldn't pay me ENOUGH to dance in your pissy ass apartment. But good luck on that low budget strip club you wanna open! Like it just amazes me how once you tell a dude you're not interested they start talking about how low budget/ugly/fat/hoe-ish w/e the case may be...if that was the case why bother hitting me up in the first place?? Oh, that's right, because you're full of shit! Dudes need to suck it up, take the loss an move the fuck on an stop being a waiting to exhale bitter bitch.
Swear he has one more time to pop up in my inbox before I lay ALL his shit bare across facebook...smh

On to the next dude. So there was this dude (and I use the past tense for a reason) that I met. Suuuuper cute, great convo, business man, alla dat. Later that night we ended up in bed and let me tell you IT WAS FUCKING AWFUL. Oh god where do I begin...
Okay so me, his roommates an my friend went back to their apartment. Upon entering I knew they had an animal cause the living room smelled like animal piss. I sat on the couch and this adorable little kitten comes out of nowhere. I'm not gonna lie, I thought it was a little weird for 3 dudes to have a cat as a pet but I'm not judging...
We all sat down to watch some stupid ass movie and meanwhile he's talking to me and his breath is kinda stinky, like he just smoked a Black & Mild...I'm not paying attention to him or whatever booboo ass movie he put on. It was hella early, and I still had a long drive home ahead of me. So he asks me if I wanna go lay down in his room. Sure, let me not be a party pooper an ruin the movie for everyone else. Before we get to his room he asks me if I've ever slept on an air mattress. Yeaaaaaah...when I first moved into my house...and he's going on and on about how he thinks they're more comfortable than regular mattresses...sir how stupid do I look? You ain't got ta lie Craig you ain't got ta lie...We get in and he closes the door behind him. I lay down an start dozing off...but he insists on fucking with me.

"Do you like massages? Cause I like giving them. Don't think it's weird that a guy likes to give massages I just do. I'm not gay or anything..."

Once again, no need for excuses dude. I'm getting this "massage", but to be completely honest it just fees like he's pinching the shit out my skin. I'm laying there trying to enjoy it but that was fucking impossible. Then he asks me to take my top off cause he's not giving me a very good massage. Okaaay top comes off. The massage didn't get any better. Then he takes off my pants and next thing I know he's giving me some Grade A head. Snap snap clap clap for me because I haven't gotten any head in a loooong time. But when he was finished working his oral magic everything went downhill. He takes off his shirt...then unbuttons his pants...and I'm staring at his boxer briefs tryna see something...no dice. Then he grabs a condom...and slips off the boxer briefs...*heavy sigh*............I just.......Ugh.......It was small. And he didn't manscape which made it worse. His pubes were like half the length of his dick! More head, then he hops on top...away he goes. He's just thrusting his little heart away and I'm more focused on my breathing and facial expressions to make this shit as believable as possible so it can be over. Like I could see him putting in work, could hear it, but I felt NOTHING. My vag felt no fullness whatsoever.

Yeah I faked the hell out of it. Sue me.

Anyways he's asking me if I like it and I'm ignoring him an grabbing the sheets...and he flips me over on my stomach. THANK GOD now I can roll my eyes and look as bored as I feel. Then he gets back on top...time to count cracks in the ceiling...He pulls out, asks if I suck and I gave him the most half assed blow job...it was sooo pathetic I'm surprised he enjoyed it...smh. So he grabs another condom and I'm just trying to find an excuse to end this shit. Thank buddah one of my piercings slipped out and on top of that he ran outta condoms (thank yaaaa) SO I was like GOOD NIGHT!!! Rolled over an went to sleep.

Or at least I tried to. This nut wanted to cuddle!! He pulled me close to him, he was kissing my shoulders, stroking my body, telling me I had beautiful eyes and I was just plain ol beautiful an blah blah blah bullshit. The whole time I'm thinking "PERSONAL. SPACE. BUDDY." You're hot, sticky and nasty. Get the fuck away from me. Then he wants to hold hands and fall asleep spooning. I swear 4:30 am could not come fast enough. As soon as my alarm went off I hopped up out tha beeeeed and tried to put my clothes on but he pinned me on top of him and asked me if I ever do raw dog (I hate that term) and I said I have...and he asked if he could. Sorry sir you're not slipping that little meal worm in me without a hat. Yuck. Got dressed and bolted out the door. I would never never never do that shit again.

Fast forward to present time. Still texting me. He's always asking when is he gonna see me again and how much he really wants to see me an how he thinks I'm a cool chick...
One night he was texting me and I was drunk and he asked me what I was doing.

Him: "Sounds like a good tym anything excitin happen?
Me: jusT whoring (I meant just waiting...but I was waiting on Happenis lol so I guess there is some truth there...)
Him: So you got laid?
ME: No nore yet..
Him: Lol o haha nvm
HIm: Not yet so ur looking to get laid then come to my paid shit (no thank you SIR we won't be doing THAT again)

Then I tell him he lives waaay too far away and he starts telling me he'll pay for my gas expenses he just wants to see me an blah blah blah. Sir if I didn't know any better I'd call that solicitation! You're paying my way over there so you can attempt to give me another round of mediocre dick. Thanks but uh, I pass. I sent him a sad face and went on about my business. Checked my phone.

Him: Whats the sad face for?
Him: ?
Him: did i say something foolish?

He's the type of dude to send 15 text messages if you don't answer one. ICK.

I told him straight up "if we ever hang out again there will be no sex involved"

Him: Lol well I'm sorry didn't you have fun?
Him: Its kool then well its up to I want to see you but ur not down then don't show I don't begg lol
Him: I'm talking bout just chilling at my pad shit I want u to even just to kick I wasn't lieing when I said ur kool as heck but it sounds like want to come by (who tf says heck??)
Him: You don't want.
Him: Shoot if u can stop by just to hang out then please do so but if not then alright
Him: Sorry my txts were so fucked up lol I'm driving and trying to txt lol
Him: But on the real my bad for making it sound as if its all about sex cause its not I'm not that type of a guy but ttyl

Let me tell you I was stressed the fuck out by the 3rd consecutive text. What happened to him not begging??? That sounds a lot like begging does it not?! Anyways one day I told him I was near his house and he goes "?" "what was that text all about?" WTF do you think you idiot?! He said came outta nowhere and I was like you know what nevermind. Then he's like no its cool so are you stopping by? Hell no.

Him: I'll give you 20 so come by lol (that's not even enough to over gas there and back. I'll pass)
Him: u gunna come by? I want you too
Him: ?
Him: Guess that's a no?
Him: lol are u coming?
Him: If u need more then ok but i need to know if ur going to come?
Him: Guess ur not then
Him: Just wondering u know i was looking forward to seeing you tonite why didn't you come by? you trying to play with my head?
Me: I was tired.
Him: k hope to see you soon
Me: probably not.
Him: Is it okay to ask why? (you're asking permission to ask a question? oh okay...)

you know what...I can't even go on with this shit. It's getting my blood pressure up and I haven't talked to this idiot in days. This is the shit I put up with on the regular. Ri-fucking-diculous. I slept with this man ONCE ages ago and he has lost his little mind, like they usually tend to do. Idk what it is...because for the most part if the sex is bad I just lay there...Men are idiots.

I'm soooo ready for friday...The work spouse is coming to visit me at the club and I have a surprise for him:) hope he likes...
Ohhh...if you wanna follow the shenanigans that go on in the club go follow my work twitter @AutumnBottom68 I find it to be pretty inneresting but for the most part I only tweet when I'm there. So if I don't tweet for a couple days dont unfollow me lol and yes I follow back.

BULLDOG

Courtesy of SexInfo101.com.
I know I posted this one before but when Happenis gets it he either puts both hands around my neck, or one grabbing a fist full of hair and the other grabbing a fist full of ass(;

Lemme be yo private dancerrr
Miss Sixxxty, your very own freak of the industryy

Friday, May 13, 2011

I've Been A Naughty Girl...

Tee hee tee hee tee hee. Lemme just start off by saying I LOVE WORKING AT THE CLUB and since I've been working there the whole "I'm desperate to feed my kids" cliche seems to go out the window, at least at my club. All the girls there love their job And the club ain't too bad either lol. I swear its never a dull night there. Between dudes sticking their faces in my ass during private lap dances (umm excuse me sir I just had sex like 2 hours ago you REALLY wanna be doin that?) to dudes tellin me they wanna pay all my bills, marry me an buy me a house lol. Sir just stick to buying lap dances an throwing money on the stage. Kthanks.
Never thought getting naked on stage an flashing my vag to the world would come so natural to me...its a lot easier than I thought. I find myself wanting to go on stage to the point I wanna jump ahead of the other girls lol.

Oh yes I think I broke the cardinal rule of stripperdom, but I'll blog about THAT when the coast is clear

The money is nice, just wish the club was closer to my house...

I had angry sex for the first time...rather he anger fucked ME when I was the one who was mad lol. We got into it over music (yes really -______-) he called me a bitch, I was fucking LI-VID. Then we made up a couple hours later and he fucked me HARD. Ooooh it was amazing...

FACTOID: Got an ugly ass yucky hickey?? If you're anything like me then you can't stop a hickey in progress due to the temporary paralysis associated with getting your neck sucked on. Then you realize its too late. Fear not, mon frere! I have a pain free remedy to rid you of those unsightly cheetah spots in less than a day! Go to the store, buy you some Visine or Clear Eyes, the ones specifically for redness, apply on your bruises, and wapow they vanish within hours! Crazy, I know. But one day I was desperate to remove them because they were SUUUPER purple, never had em that dark before, and cover up only made them worse (too hot for scarves an whatnot), googled it, saw someone used Visine, tried it an now I SWEAR by it.

I wonder how many of you are gonna go get hickies after reading this just to try it out lol IT WORKS!!!


So um...Is it wrong that the Work Spouse slapped my ass? An I mean some nice hard ass slaps...I would hope not...cause then it would be wrong of me to say that I got a lil wet when he did it lol. What can I say...My ass is fantASStic an it loves attention...(tention...sexual tension...yes. it is becoming to great. I swear this man wishes to be raped by me. And I'm about two ass slaps away from making that wish come true...)

OOOH OOOOH OOOH!!! Lets say you HAD to choose between a sugar daddy who would be a great bf (and he's not an old geezer he's young) but you had sex with him and it was HOrrendous...but then you had this other dude who is a fucking AMAZING lover but he's just a dick. What would you choose? I understand relationships aren't based solely off sex, but I think sex is pretty damn important! I mean I can only fake like I''m having fun before I start faking headaches. For all you telling me to train him, you can't train someone's dick to grow. Dude had all the motion in the ocean in the world, I jut couldn't feel the waves if you catch my drift...I saw it happening, and I could hear it, but I couldn't feel it. Now, don't get me wrong he gave me some of the BEST head I ever had in my life...I thought all those other guys were doin something then he started doing his thing and MAN OH MAN idk if its the VCH piercing or if his tongue is just THAT good but gad damn if I could just have him eat me out all the time and not have to worry about him asking for sex after I would be a happy camper...le sigh...
NOW on the OTHER HAND, we have this sex GOD who blows my back out all the fucking time and its great every time, but we pretty much established that we're ONLY having sex on occasion.
Do I want a relationship and sacrifice good sex, and potentially cheat (I never been put into that position so idk how long I could last without some bamb vitamin D) or do I continue to have semi-casual monogamous sex with the asshole? Tough call bro...

Shit...I'm not even too big on receiving but thinking about that one night has me squirming in my seat...sheesh...

Any fellow dancers out there I need cute clothes I've got one outfit. ONE. The only store that sells stripper-esque clothes out here they're kinda ugly and remind me of 90's era bathing suits. I ended up getting lucky with the one thing I DID find...any online sites I should check out?

A lot of my guy friends are all excited that I dance now...they think I can hook them up with my stripper friends...just use me, don't come to the club cause you wanna hang out an support me but because they wanna hit on my friends lol. Silly men...I wonder if Happenis would be willing to watch me practice my floor work...oddly enough even though he's seen me naked plenty of times I feel like he would laugh:( Any volunteers? lol

I got my salad tossed for the first time. And that's all I have to say about that. *Forrest Gump Voice*

Mmm, I can't think of anything else spectacular to write about, SO I'll leave off with this, I hope I get fucked tonight.

SPREAD EAGLE

Courtesy of SexInfo101.com.
Good boy...good boy in-DEED

EMAILS POR FAVOR!!!
ASKMISSSIXXXTY at YAHOO dot COM:)
Miss Sixxxty, your very own freak of the industryy

Monday, May 2, 2011

And Now, Coming To The Stage...

You guys thought I was joking when I said "Fuck it I'ma just become a stripper". Nope. As of this past Friday night/Saturday morning I am an official showgirl lol. I think it's absolutely insane how it happened...I went on a road trip to SoCal with 3 of my guy friends and on the way we're all plugging in our phones an showing off our music and I play "Spend It All" by Chris Brown for them (I was showing them the uncut video, sorry I can't find an embeddable version for you guys:( I'm working on it) and one of my friends suggest we should go to the nude bar on the way back. I was suuuuper juiced because I had been wanting to go since I turned 18 and either couldn't find people to go with me or when I would make plans with my friends all of a suddden hours before we're supposed to leave no one can make it.
On the way back I was suuuper excited because I knew what was next. But everyone was sleepy, and suddenly I could feel myself getting disappointed again. I was pissed because everyone was talking like they really wanted to go and now all of a sudden everyone just wants to go home. Ugh...

FORTUNATELY everyone got their second wind and we got to go:) I took out 100 bucks, cashed em for singles an went inside. The atmosphere was cool, there were like 2 hot girls, a lot of average ones, but they all knew what they were doin. Immediately one girl comes up to me an asks me if I want a dance. I look at my friends an say sure why not. We're in the booth and she's givin me my dance and when she rubs her hands from my legs to my stomach she lifts up my shirt and starts asking me about all my piercings. We start chatting, an I was tellin her IDC if she finished the dance and I told her how I was considering dancing. She told me I was really pretty and I should totally do it. I was a lil skeptical cause I always imagined myself dancing in a topless bar, not on stage flashing my vag to the world.
We watch a few more dances and one of my friends ends up retreating to the car (he couldn't hang lol) and I go to the bathroom. On my way out my friend brings another girl to me and he's like "aye lift your shirt up!" So I show him an she's telling me about all these tatts an piercings she wants an I was like thats cool. Then I can't remember exactly who brought up me dancing but then WE got to talkin an she asks me if I want her to talk to her boss for me. Uhh, sure lol. In 5 minutes she brings him back an he gives me the once over. Tells me I'm a cute girl and I can definitely make some money there. Then he asks me if I want to audition. In front of all those people AND my friends?? I contemplated it, I hadn't landscaped in almost two weeks, and I had nothing to wear.

"Well that's okay you can borrow an outfit from me and some shoes from one of the girls!"

Why thank you lol. He let me know if I audition I would need to do two dances, one clothed and one nude, I'd sign my contract and have to stay until the club closed, and since me an my friends came in as customers I couldn't leave with them. That sucked cause we were like 2 hours away from our town. He told me I could come back Sunday night for Amateur Night an I would just need to bring two friends so we could make some money. Two problems with that: I had already called off that day and couldn't afford to call off again and I don't know any other girls with the balls to do that lol.
My two main problems were my ride an my vag. Those girls are smart. One girl was like "We'll take you 'home' an drop you off down the street at your friends car" and someone ended up giving me a skirt because I guess as long as I take off my panties I can keep the skirt on an somewhat shield myself. I went to ask my friends if they were willing to stay til 2 so I could audition an they agreed! Great, now my friends can get a full frontal view of my snatch game lol. I felt suuuuper bummy, I had ZERO make up on or in my purse (it was in my car at home) and my hair wasn't done. But I got changed in the locker room (where I was bombarded with more questions about my piercings lol) and I went up to the DJ and gave him my stage name an told him I wanted to dance to Lenny Kravitz "Fly Away" (fucking love that song) When I heard myself being announced as an audition I sauntered up the stairs, looked into the crowd an let loose. There's two stationary poles off to either side of the stage and one spinning one in the middle. I love spinning poles:) all you have to do is get a firm grip and pose, the pole does the rest. I did some floor work, trying to remember things I learned in my couple pole classes, remembering NOTHING. I thought it would be best to just stick to what I was comfortable with and not make an ass of myself my first time on stage. The second song starts up and I know thats my cue to start disrobing. Off goes the top, off goes the panties and there I am, grinding and twirling in front of all these people in my birthday suit. Surprisingly enough I was somewhat comfortable with it. Finished my set an collected my tips and I felt good:) for a newbie the people seemed to like me. I would say the only thing that made me uncomfortable would be my friends smiling at me from off stage cause I knew they were thinking "dude this is insane and hilarious you're naked" and I would just give them the "shut the fuck up" smile from stage.
I got off stage and some of the girls congratulated me and my friends told me I did good, that I should just use the other two poles more. I think I will when I get comfortable on stage. Found my boss and filled out my paperwork and I was official. He showed me around the club, explained the VIP section an how the private dances worked. Explained my pay which I hear is different from most clubs. Most have a house fee that you pay and then you keep whatever else you make; my club is a 40/60 split, I keep 60% of my dances and all my tips. He explained the rules of being on stage and how scheduling works, and then I was off to tend to myself. We have these Blue Light Specials, where when the blue light goes off in the club I have to report to the stage and then go out in the audience and ask for dances until the light goes off. I can't refuse if a customer wants to buy me a drink (since its a full nude bar there's no alcohol). I swear the next two hours, longest two hours of my life. I did one more stage dance and then I did 2 private dances. I have to stay at the club after it closes to cash out and make sure the customers leave. The girls dropped me off down the street and I hopped into my friends car and headed back into town. Counted my tips, made off with about 90 bucks, minus what I tipped the DJ.

I still can't believe I did that shit lol.

The girls for the most part were nice, one was a blatant bitch, who when I said hi to her she didn't say shit to me (thank god I didn't tip her ass) but then again one of the other girls told me she didn't like her anyways, now I see why. There was another one who I thought was just absolutely GORGEOUS, she had big boobs an a tiny waist and a huge ass and she was tall...le sigh...at first she didn't speak to me either but then after I started working she sat down next to me and chatted with me a bit. One of the girls asked me if I was straight/bi/lezzie, all the while twirling my hair and giving me THAT look. I just giggled an smiled.

Thank god for this job, because I was about to burn that morning one down to the ground.

Figure since I let go of one of my jobs I can start going back to my pole class to sharpen my skills. Can't look like a newbie forever. Those girls were poppin' it, doin the splits, all kinds of pole tricks...I wanna learn:( but idk if I should ask anyone for help lol

This was a mouthful.

LAP DANCE

Courtesy of SexInfo101.com.
It only seemed right lol...Took Mr. Happenis aka Blue Magic, for those unaware, out for tacos an when I went to pay he asked me where I got all the singles. I said where do you think? And his answer was "SOOO...this means I can say I'm fucking a stripper now?" why yes, yes you can. LOL smh THISS kid...

There she go slidin' down the pole...
Miss Sixxxty, your very own freak of the industryy