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Wednesday, July 28, 2010

How Does Miss Sixxxty Like Her Sex??

I may regret this blog in the morning, but as of right now babes an gents, I DON'T GIVE A DAMN!!!
I'm so sick of getting thisclose to getting laid, then having it snatched away from me!!!
I mean how can you turn down all this deliciousness on a silver platter?! Jesus...Got the debbies all nice and hot, fresh out the oven...and you disappear!!!

Fuck man.

So since I can't get any dick in real life at this point, I'm just going to fantasize out loud about how this damn drought SHOULD end. Granted when it DOES end it won't even be remotely close to how I am about to envision it.

Cue "Confessions" album.

I'm ready.

Strangers to the blog, go read "All About Your Sexual Hygiene:)" so that you're up to speed on things.

Once I'm all ready for you, I'm gonna invite you over to my place. More than likely I've gone lingerie shopping in the past few days so I've got on the whole get up: the lingerie, the fishnets, the garter, the stilettos, the whole nine.
But I won't greet you at the door wearing that; I'll be wearing it UNDER my clothes.
I'll greet you at the door, you'll sit awkwardly on the couch cause we both know why you're there, just waiting on someone to make the first move. I'll pop in a scary movie an get close to you on the couch.

SIDEBAR: If you're a guy and I ever invite you over to my place an play a scary movie, that means I'm tryna get some ass. Just an FYI

When I'm ready, I'll pretend to be scared, just to get closer to you. I'll look up at you, you'll look down at me, and if you don't realize this is your cue to kiss me, then you can hop your ass up off my couch and leave at this point.
Anyways, back to the kissing. This will lead to me straddling you, and I may slip your shirt off. When you try to take mine off I'll stop you(:
More making out, you can kiss my neck cause I LA-LA-LA-LOVE it. Before you get the chance to throw me on the couch I'll hop up and run off somewhere, where I will strip down to the lingerie an call you over.
So you see me, leaning on the wall looking all kinds of delicious and we pick right back up on the kissing. I'll probably lean into you so I can cop a feel w/o you noticing lol
Then you would wanna pick me up and carry me back to the love dungeon aka my room.
You can lay me on the bed and take your pants off(:
Hop on top of me and continue with the neck kissing to warm me up.
Trust me; a lil effort goes a looooong way.
I'll roll you over so I'm on top, pull you in a sitting position, pop my bra off an let you an my nips get acquainted. Then I'll push you down and reciprocate the favor (sans the nip licking and sucking; unless you're into that kind of thing)
And just because I'm such a nice person and I like taking care of my men, let me do the honors and please you first.
It's hot where I live right now, so I'll probably have some Listerine pocket packs and a cup of cold ass juice on the night stand. Menthol + cold juice = extremely cool. Lemme take a sip of that an get down to business. Trust me, from what I've heard it's amazeballs.

Anyways, if you're not a bitch you can return the favor now.
I won't mind nor will I stop you. I promise.
If you have hair I'm gonna play with it; can't help myself.
The Carnie would let me go from laying on my back to riding his face in one swift roll. Ahhhhhh he was a lot of fun(:

Well what about the lights?

Keep em on, I like to see what I'm doing.

So by now I know you're ready to go.
For some reason men like the look of lingerie but they think it's too complicated. SO for you I wont hook up the garters so you can slip everything right off.
Enjoy.

Now all this homework I've been leaving you, I'm putting it all to work tonight.
So I hope you drank your RockStar an busted that first nut before you came to see me, cause I'm puttin you to work and there's a slight chance you may have to put in some overtime.
I want it rough, so if I say "Spank Me" don't give me a light lil love tap on the ass. Make it sting. If you're behind me, pull my hair an make me arch my back into you.
If you're on top, whisper something in my ear, suck on my neck an breathe hard. The warm feeling feels insane.
Now when I say whisper something to me, asking me how it feels will do just fine. None of that "Your little hole is soooo tight" bullshit.
Don't kill the mood.
If you're spooning with me, let your hands explore my body; grab my neck an slip the other hand between my legs.
If I'm on top an facing you? grab my hips.
Facing away from you? Smack my ass. A lot.
Now while I can't go too much into detail, cause I've already written too much here lol just go through all the posts an peep the homework and let your imagination run wild.
When I finally DO get some dick, I will be sure to let you know IN detail. As I always do for my babes an gents.

Well, here's some homework for those of you who are getting laid (lucky bastards)

MIRROR OF PLEASURE

Courtesy of SexInfo101.com.
Just another position to add to my repertoire while I wait for my knight in shining body oil. I'm just waiting to be rubbed down. God save the queen.

Send your words of encouragement through this hard time of lack of penis to AskMissSixxxty@yahoo.com

Adios,
Miss Sixxxty, Your very own freak of the industryy

Saturday, July 24, 2010

Bonetown

Busy busy busy me. Babes an gents you'd be proud of me. I finally signed up for a pole fitness class (lemme just say my muscles are SHOT) and its faboosh!
So far I've learned a simple routine consisting of some basic spins, crawls, an floor work.
You'd be proud of me.
As promised I shall be documenting them in a blog, but that's not the point of this blog today.

One of my fave blogs The Boobs posted a video a few weeks back and I'm barely getting to my take on the game (deepest apologies) lol.
Let's take a peeky-peek shall we?

OR watch it here via mobile web.
Gotta love the :57 mark.
"You a healthy lookin lil mo'fucka. How about helpin a workin girl out an gettin me my crack rock back. I'll give you the best gummer you've ever had."


/\__/\__/\__________ I have officially #flatlined.
I've heard of porn type video games but this mess takes the cake an ice cream!
It's backed by Ron Jeremy, aka the Messiah of the porn world, aka the hairy white guy with a huge dick.

Hmmm...didn't know Pinky got down like that...I've always been curious to know how good he was in the sack. I mean he IS Ron Jeremy...W/e lemme get back on task...

I really wanted to play the demo and let you guys know what I thought, whether it was worth paying the 34.99 for the download or 39.99 for the actual CD-ROM (I wonder why anyone would buy the CD-ROM when you clearly can just download it for cheaper...idk...). You can also play a mini game *here* for a one time fee of 4.99 (not bad)

Maybe sometime within the coming weeks I'll grow a pair and download it to my laptop, play a few rounds and let you know what I think.
From what I'm reading, its basically like any GTA game, where you have he ability to roam around, but there are still "missions" you need to complete in order to advance throughout the game, and work your way up to boning those hot chicks.
I will admit I do love the way their boobs move. I can't wait to buy my own(:

Could this game be the future of porn? Or is it just too much work to get off? If you're like me, you may be easily distracted. I know when I'm tryna get off I can't be thinkin hella shit, I just gotta focus on the finish line.

...There I go getting off topic again.

But I guess I won't know until I play it.
But I hadn't hear of the game, doubt you guys had either. Just thought I'd share this lil nugget of joy with you all.
Don't forget to email me kids. I haven't done a Q&A blog in ages an I'm kinda itchin to. AskMissSixxxty@yahoo.com

Homework for tonight, as promised.
UNDER THE CUKOO'S NEST

Courtesy of SexInfo101.com.
I could get down with this. The name doesn't hurt either lol. I'm in dire need of some good head. For this one I'd probably wanna be propped up against a wall, you know, in case he's JUST that good(:

Au revoir, mon amoures
Miss Sixxxty, you're very own freak of the industryy

Monday, July 19, 2010

Grrrr Is For Grizzly Bear:)

Babes an gents I have a tad bit of a dilemma.
Okay so a few weeks back I wrote about my coworker, the one who bitched out on me at the last minute?
Well yeah after weeks of the silent treatment we started talking again.
He asked me to take his shift one day and I did it, then we started texting like we usually did.
During this whole conversation I'm trying my best not to bring anything up that would remind us of the whole lap straddling incident, cause we just got over the awkwardness and I didn't want history to repeat itself.

Well shit, apparently I didn't try hard enough.

For those of you who follow my primary twitter (that's how most of you found out about the blog anyways:) ) you know I love bein in lingerie.
Well I had myself a lil photoshoot showcasing all my diff outfits.
And I was in the middle of one when he texted me asking me how the shift went. I told him I was busy taking the pics and I get

"Well shit can i get one for free:)"

Got damn it I barely got over the fact that I can't have my way with you and you say something like that.
You guys know I have no willpower.
And he is low key beautiful.
What's a girl to do?!
Well I didn't send one, but I told him maybe he could get one if he reminded me in the morning.
Last time it took him one night to get all guilt trippy on me so I thought, "Well if it happened last time, it can happen again" I mean I can understand thinking with your penis in the heat of the moment but damn!

This morning I get a text
"Do I get one now?"

SHIT.

I've been fighting it. But idk how long I can fight it.
I haven't had sex in about 4 months.
He's gonna catch me on a particularly bad day and I'm gonna catch him alone and it'll be a wrap!
PROS: I get some penis finally.
CONS: he guilt trips me YET AGAIN and/or he may be just a missionary man.


FOR MY BABES: have you ever just looked at a guy an thought he'll be boring in bed? Like not even tryna be mean but when I look at him I can't see him throwing my legs over his shoulder an givin it to me the way I want, smackin my ass all the while. He looks like he likes being on top. I could be wrong tho. But then again I could be right.

*SIGH* I haven't heard from him all day so like last time I guess I'll have to wait an see...of course I'll keep you guys updated tho;)

For homework tonight I thought I'd give you guys a peek into my head.
The things I would do to him...
SEE-SAW

Courtesy of SexInfo101.com.
This man just doesn't know...I'd work him over and out...don't let me catch him down a dark alley...

So should I go through with it or what? Send me emails to AskMissSixxxty@yahoo.com tell me what'cha think!

Damn I hope I get some dick soon. I'm not thinkin straight lol
Miss Sixxxty, your very own freak of the industryy

Thursday, July 15, 2010

The Carnie, Pt. II

I rarely get to see the Carnie, only when the fair is in town (hence the name).
So I made sure to get in contact with him this past October because I loooooove his sex. Its wild, animalisic an fun.
I didn't even bother going to the fair that year I just asked him if he was gonna be in town. He said he'd tell me when he got his schedule.
A few days later I got a text from him along the lines of

"Hey cutie, I'm gonna be in town 7th-13th. If you could find me some weed that'd be sweet:)"

So I made it my mission to find him some.
Problem was, I'm not a smoker so I had no idea where to begin! Most of my friends that smoke weren't answering me back, (they clearly didn't realize how crucial this weed was in my quest for dick) I found a friend at the local park who happened to smoke and he sent me to his man.
Bought the weed, showered and landscaped and I was off to the hotel.
I showed up, and he immediately busted out his bong.
Like I said I'm not a fan of smoking, but for some good penis hey, to each his own.
He looked at me and asked me if I wanted to take a hit. I told him nah, I'm good, but he wasn't taking no for an answer. Then I told him I've never smoked in my life and he said "What better time to try than now?"
He explained what I needed to do, and it all sounded soo complicated so I just smiled and nodded and pretended like I knew what the hell he was talking about.
So he held the lighter for me and he just told me to suck. So I'm sucking and thinking "Oh, this is easy!"
Then all of a sudden he pulled the little pipe looking thing and the smoke invaded my lungs. My throat was ON FIRE. he laughed at me and told me to drink some juice.
Idk what the fuck happened, but I don't think I did it right, because I wasn't high AT ALL. He asked me if I wanted to try again. But this time he would make it easy on me. As I'm sitting on the edge of the bed watching take a hit, he grabs me and shot guns me. For those unaware, it looked something like this:
SIDE NOTE: they are too cute for words...

I wasn't sure how long I was supposed to hold the smoke down until he looked at me and said "Why are you still holding it in?" I exhaled and things got a little crazy.

ISN'T IT FUNNY HOW...
That was all he said and I started CRACKING UP. For some reason everything was so funny! Then the world started moving in slow motion. And I started panicking.

Me: WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO ME?!?!?!?!
Him: you're high.
M: WHY?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?! MAKE THE MADNESS STOP!!!!!
H: you gotta eat something. or do something physical if you wanna kill your high.

He was sitting in a chair at the time so I strolled over and straddled him.

"Something physical like what? make it stop:)"

He pulled down my shirt and started giving the girls some attention, then he picked me up and carried me to the bed. I was (once again) wearing stretch pants that tie at the top. And he hates those cause they don't come down easy. He attempted to untie them and then gave up. He stuck his head between my legs and went to town. While he was down there I was able to untie an kick off my pants. Then he got naked in about 2 seconds flat and got on top.
My head is spinning as all this is going on and he seems to be riding his high out just fine.
I rolled him on his back and hopped on top and started riding away. After a while I hopped off and and was gonna get into reverse cowgirl but he grabbed me and sat me on his face. Man oh man that was good. I pulled myself away and finished what I had started (Reverse cowgirl) and he sat up, grabbed my hair and pushed me down so my ass was in the air. He got off the bed and behind me and started pounding away. Now idk about you babes out there, but gettin it from behind and your hair pulled is great.
Now with all this wild thrusting there's bound to be some slippage. He slipped out and then I felt him bite me on the ass. Now I am obsessed with getting my ass nibbled on lol.
Then he ate me out from behind, which felt different. In a good way tho.
He picked me up again and threw me on the nightstand and collapsed on me.
Something about having a man collapse on me after he finishes just makes me excited.
After he regained consciousness he went to the bathroom and I realized I had to drive home and panicked.

"OH MY GOD I HAVE TO DRIVE HOME I CAN'T DO THIS!!! I AM GONNA DIE i can't go to sleep I'M GONNA DIE!!!"

I was so tired but I felt that if I went to sleep, I wouldn't wake up. I had convinced myself I was gonna die that night.
He offered to drive me home and I calmly explained "I CAN'T LEAVE MY CAR HERE!!! I NEED TO GO HOME!!"
So I drove the long drive home, 35 mph, cops on every corner.
Thank god my parents were sleeping when I got home cause I looked like hell
Hair a mess, clothes disheveled, eyes bloodshot.
I was literally shaking like a crack head.
Ever since that night I have sworn off ever getting high again.
For all you smokers out there, if how I felt was how being high was supposed to feel, then you are all crazy.

I really miss sex. like REALLY.
PIRATE'S BOUNTY

Courtesy of SexInfo101.com.
This looks like soo much fun...I wish I could try this out:(

Kisses,
Miss Sixxxty, your very own freak of the industry

Sunday, July 11, 2010

The Carnie Pt. I

Okie doke, so I'm bored and lonely at work:(
What better time to have story time than now!
I haven't told u guys about The Carnie yet. My friends call him a carnie cause he works @ the fairs but he's far from strange;)

I live in a large city, but there ain't shit to do here.
So when the fair comes, it's like a big deal. Everyone gets dressed up in the hoochie hoe fits and people are always fighting. Oh, and greasy food. A good time.
And one year my friend convinced me to go on the opening day. I wasn't a big fair goer, but I wanted a corn dog and a funnel cake.
We're walking around, and something told me to go to the reptile exhibit.
We go in there and I see this beautiful caramel man with nice teeth. I looked at my friend and clutched my pearls "I. MUST. HAVE. HIM."
We introduced ourselves and exchanged numbers "in case he got bored" and "needed something to do"
Two days later he asked me if I wanted to see a movie when his shift was over.
I had other plans in mind:)

The same friend was having a kick back at her house and the plan was to pick him up, have a few drinks, hang out and that's it.
I went to pick him up at his hotel and we hung out at my friend's house. But then my other BFF called me because she wanted to meet this man I had been telling her about. So me, my BFF (at the time), her BFF and her BF all went to a sex toy shop and then back to his hotel room. I had to leave because my other friend was drunk and I didn't want her to lock me out. So I told my BFF in case she did to NOT leave the hotel room until I got back.

WELL my friend passed out an locked me out the house. And my BFF took off and wasn't answering the phone...
So I had to ask the Carnie if I could stay with him. I hadn't expected him to say yes!
He offers me a drink but it was some nasty ale shit so I passed. We were laying in his bed watching South Park so I scooted closer to him.
And a lil closer.
And a wee bit closer.
Next thing I know he rolls on top of me and starts kissing me.
Yes, yes, yes! this is what I've been waiting for!!
Then he got all primal and animalistic on me!
I had on some sweats that were tied because they were a little big and after fumbling to get them untied he just pulled em to my ankles and got between my legs so the pants acted as a sort of bind.
So he ate me out for a little bit and this was when I discovered he had his tongue pierced (yessssssss) then I pulled the pants all the way off and he got naked in like 2 seconds flat. He got on top and threw my legs over his shoulder and went to work. Then I felt my body being dragged across the bed and he went down on me AGAIN. He has that nice hair that I was telling you guys I like to pull on...Anyways he came up for air and penetrated me with my legs dangling over the edge of the bed. Then he picked me up and threw me on the dresser and pushed my knees onto his chest while he kissed my neck and grabbed my ass.
Then I was in the air.
And then on the dresser with a mirror.
My head kept hitting the mirror making a loud pounding noise

Me: Wait what about the people in the next room?
The Carnie: You want me to stop?
M: NO!
C: Its just my boss next door anyways...


Well alrighty then!
The next thing I knew I was back on the bed but I wanted to be on top. So here I am, happily bouncing my ass on this man, thinking "Wow, he's like four years older than me!"
Then he got back on top and passed out.
And I didn't even have to give him head!
So I was just in a love struck coma when he got out the bed and asked me if I was gonna join him in the shower.
I hopped up in the shower and started to make out with him again and he turned me around and bent me over.
He musta never been with a black girl cause I was trying to stay as far as possible from the water. My hair was already starting to frizz up! I turned back around to kiss him but I lost my balance.
I tried to grab onto the shower curtain but couldn't grab that slippery bastard! So I fell backwards, my elbow hit the toilet and I landed on my ass.
So here is the Carnie, laughing his as off, while the shower head was aiming directly at my naked ass, making a huge ass puddle.
After about 5 minutes, he finally caught his breath and asked me if I was okay. We dried off, I hopped in the bed, shoulders throbbing. He came back from the bathroom to inform me "Aye man you broke my flusher!" I guess on the way down my shoulder took out the flusher handle. It snapped right in the middle so it was unfixable. He finished taking his pee (swear this man takes the longest pees!) and hopped in the bed. After about 10 minutes of pure silence, he busted out laughing because he thought about what happened again.
But the sex was good. So I let him laugh.

Now comes part two, when he made me his official weed finder.
And I smoked for the first time.
That was an experience.
For another day;)

But for right now, lemme give y'all some homework to do
Eve's Ecstasy

Courtesy of SexInfo101.com.
Heh heh...I need to get back in touch with him...

Love me,
Miss Sixxxty, Your very own freak of the industryy

Thursday, July 8, 2010

One, Two, Three, FORE:)

Foreplay
a set of intimate psychological and physical acts between two or more people meant to create desire for sexual activity and sexual arousal -Wikipedia definition

Foreplay
What is supposed to come before sex or leading up to it. Often conveniently forgotten by the male. -UrbanDictionary.com

Why is foreplay so important to women you ask?
Put it like this: men are like scooters; doesn't take much to get em going. Women are like car heaters in the winter; gotta warm up the car first in order to get that heater scorchin':)

Me, myself, I'm a HUGE advocate of foreplay. I hate when boys dive straight between my legs and then wonder why I look like I'm not enjoying myself.
Chances are if there's no foreplay, I'm bound to be dry. Penis + dry vag = chaffing. No fun for either of us.

FLASHBACK: I went to go "hang out" with a guy from one of my classes. Semester was over so we'd occasionally text each other. When I arrived we watched "Vantage Point" and I was bored because it was a stupid movie. Then he turned off the movie and kissed me. Not the world's best kisser, but definitely not the worst. Next thing I know he stripped down from the waist down! Ordinarily I'd be excited but this time I was somewhat confused. He slid my basketball shorts down while I laid there like a vegetable and after about two minutes he stopped.

Me: What's the problem?
Him: You don't seem like you like it. Makes me feel like I'm not puttin it down. (He wasn't)
M: What?
H: You make me question my manhood...
M: *sucks teeth* Okaaaaaaaay?


So I left, unsatisfied. Man fuck his ego what about me and my needs?!


Babes and gents, the issue was I wasn't turned on! The mindset wasn't there.
Had he sucked on my neck a lil' bit beforehand, we probably woulda been ready to go!
While I'm pretty sure my gents loooooove a wet pussy (and yes, I'm cringing as I say that word). And why is that? Because it makes the sex feel better right?
So why do some of you insist on sex without foreplay??
Find me a woman who doesn't enjoy some form of foreplay and I'll show you a mutant.
I take that back - Neytiri from Avatar was a mutant and she liked foreplay too.
For my Babes & Gents, this is for you(:
This is how I like MY foreplay. Results may vary.
(You can thank me after you catch your breath and rehydrate)

Massages: Who doesn't love a good rubdown?! How I do MY massages, I'll sit on the lucky gent an give him a massage (with his shirt ON). Then depending on the scenery (Am I at work? Am I at home and my family is due to arrive soon? Are we at his place?) I'll say something like "I can do a much better job with this shirt out the way..." and pull the shirt off. I don't have oil or lubes handy, so I use my Vanilla Noir (courtesy of Bath & Body Works) lotion. The scent of vanilla + the body heat from my hands = intoxicating. That way whenever they smell it elsewhere they think of me(:
Anyways, lotion is usually cold straight out the bottle. So I pour a little bit in my hands, warming it in my palms. Then when he thinks I'm gonna pour some more lotion on my hands I pop my bra off, put some lotion on my boobs (another perk to having pierced nips) and on my hands and I rub my boobs across his back while I'm massaging his shoulders. He usually rolls over on his back after this;)
***Another thing I like to do is sit behind a dude with long hair (think Pauly D) and run my fingers through his hair. Tugging, massaging, scratching...the scalp has a lot of nerve endings. That's why some babes like having their hair pulled during sex.

Now that I'm sitting on his stomach this is the perfect time for him to sit up and start kissing on my neck. I like when he's sucking on my neck and also breathing on my neck between sucks. Breathing, not blowing. There IS a difference. It literally sends chills up my spine. Bite me a lil bit, lick behind my ear (I promise its clean back there:) ).

By this time I should be able to feel your growing erection (love that feeling, yay for basketball shorts!) then I'm gonna push you off, and stare at you. I'll grab your hands and pin them above your head and return the favor.
Some grinding is expected. When I come up for air we can play a bit of tonsil hockey and then the fun part: GETTING NAKED!!!
Since we already got our shirts off time to put your mouth where the nip is lol
Then its YOUR TURN to push me on MY back. Pull my pants down (if I'm wearing any). Once those are off I'm gonna roll you to the side, slide your pants down...you know what happens next;)

*Drops mic, exits stage left*
Leave emails @ AskMissSixxxty@yahoo.com please:)

Homework:)
STANDING DOGGY STYLE

Courtesy of SexInfo101.com.
Mmmmmmmmm, baby.

Once again, You're welcome.
Miss Sixxxty, your very own freak of the industryy

Saturday, July 3, 2010

Premature Ejaculators and Erectile Dysfunction

GAAAAAAAH I JUST WANNA RIP MY HAIR OUT!!!
I think in about every blog I address my drought.
Well, last night me and some friends went out, I had a few drinks, feelin good (not buzzed but good).
And the drought got the best of me.
So I called this little boy who doesn't live too far from my job.
And when I say little I mean LITTLE, as in he's entering senior year in high school.
All I wanted to do was make out with the boy! Maybe get my neck sucked on a bit.
I had a romp in the car with the boy before...ugh...the whole 45 seconds I kept thinking I'm going to hell...I'm going to hell for this shit!!! but it was over before I realized he was all the way in!!!
I said "Let me know when you're close" and then I immediately heard his breathing increase. I stopped him and said "Are you done??" He said no but then when I tried to move he said "I'm about to ooze."

WHAT. THE. FUCK?!

Like are you fucking kidding me?! I looked at him, silently put my shirt back on and said "We needa work on that".

So last night when I was making out with him in my car he kept asking me to take off my shorts. Because of the way last time went, I wasn't gonna waste ending a drought on 45 second dick! But I also didn't know how to tell him he came too quick for me.
So I dropped his ass off and went home.

That is what I get for messing with little boys right?
WRONG!!!

Because then there was my neighbor, The Martian (he took that whole Lil' Wayne thing a lil TOO seriously). He was like 4 years older than I am.
And I had sex with him plenty of times.
And lets say out of 15 times he kept his erection TWICE. The first and second times we had sex. Then everything went downhill from there.
It was the same routine EVERY TIME.

First we'd spoon, he'd enter from the back.
Then I'd roll on my stomach,
Then I'd lean over the edge of the bed (his bed came up to my waist. That bed was probably the best thing about going to his house.)
Then he'd pull out cause he got soft on me...and that's when shit got awkward.
Cause he'd rest his dick on my ass and jack off in attempts to get hard.
He'd smush his balls into me (ICK ICK ICK) making the bed shake from his lack of blood in his penis.
At first I was shocked. And I offered to help, like any good sexual partner would do.
But then it started to get irritating.
I'd sit there, ass in the air facing away from him, rolling my eyes the whole time...
It just became too much so whenever he'd text me it would be like "I'm tired" "I'm not home" "I'm sick". And since I didn't wanna have sex with his non erection keeping ass I was all of a sudden acting "brand new".
Well shit he's a janky promoter!
I distinctly remember him telling me (y'all gon make me log into my myspace and find them messages)

Hun, I've done just about everything you can imagine.
Play ya cards right and you might have GREAT stories to tell ya friends


Oh, I got great stories to tell em...THEY ALL LAUGH AT ME!!!
Remember that time you were "puttin in overtime" an the sweat started poppin off your forehead like hot grease and I thought you were spitting on my back?
Oh yeah, sounds like a GREAT time in my book!

Eventually he moved across the country and stopped harassing me.

I'm telling you all of this because I did a phone/twitter poll of which is worse.
Everyone (except this one dude, but I think he's a virgin anyways) said not being able to keep an erection is the worst possible thing that can happen to a man.
And I agree.
Cause if a dude busts that quick nut before your arrival the sex last longer.
This is a proven FACT.

But the dudes I choose, its one thing or another with them.
Because asking for a gent with a big penis and stamina AND good looks is too much to ask these days...

*SIGH* for gents suffering with Limpdickitis I sincerely suggest you invest in a cock ring and do it TOday.
That should keep you hard and your partner pleased.

Babes an gents send me your various opinions @ AskMissSixxxty@yahoo.com
I love hearin from you guys(:

Homework for this evening!
CROSS

Courtesy of SexInfo101.com.
This was mine && The Big Carl's fave position. Idk why but it's fun!

Yay for good sex!!!
Miss Sixxxty, your very own freak of the industryy

Friday, July 2, 2010

Touch Me, Tease Me:)

Good evening babes an gents:)
I'm starting to think I'm never gonna have the pleasure of a real penis ever again.
I'm starting to lose track of the days...
Although i DO remember the last time I had sex was April 17th, 2010 around 3:30 am.
And while T.O.N.y. wasn't makin me see stars or anything, his body and looks (and amazing nip licking) made up for all that.

Now, what does a hyper-sexual individual such as myself do in a drought like this?
Welp, I bust out the toys in dire situations.
Sex for me isn't about always getting there. I enjoy the ride.
While i prefer having a man on top of me, there are those days where I just severely need to release some tension.
Females ARE capable of getting blue balls, although Cosmo so lovingly renamed it "Pink Balls" lol

*GASP* Did she just say she masturbates???

Yes in the fuck I did.
There isn't anything wrong with it. Gents do it all the time!
Hell, I did a twitter poll and some gents do it 5 times a day! If I had a penis, I'd jerk it all day!
Let's see...my first time...

STUPID TOOTHBRUSH
I was a freshman in high school when I first discovered the beauty of self pleasure...
(Let me be the first to say the "M" word is ugly and I hate it. It's right up there with "Pussy")
I was home alone and my mom had bought me one of those automatic toothbrush thingies and i was gettin ready to brush my teeth and the stupid brush attachment broke off! so all i was stuck with was the part that you twist to turn it on.
And since I was home alone...and the toothbrush DID vibrate...I thought to myself hmm...

"Lets try it"

It was amazing.
I'm pretty sure everyone remembers their first orgasm.
Its usually fantabulous. And it was! I wanted to do it over and over!
But then my parents came back home so I just shoved it behind the sink and waited for them to leave again.
So every time they left, I'd bust out the broken toothbrush.
But sadly, I threw it away (why? idk..) nd graduated to penis lol.

For me, I don't like the whole using the fingers deal. I can't even get aroused with my fingers. I feel weird. Now gimme a toy, and its full steam ahead!
Now, I'm not knocking anyone who likes their digits, I'm just saying what I prefer.
This is my motto

I am incapable of tickling myself, so why should I finger myself?

Boys are lucky they can use their hands and be happy=/
For my babes who are shy, I believe in order to have your partner please you the way you wanna be pleased you gotta know how to please yourself.
Ultimately you know your body the best, why not get better acquainted with it?
If you're like me, and get the heebie jeebies when you think about using your fingers, there's a shitload of great toys out there.
If you're lucky like me, you'll have a 24 hr. sex toy shop in your city. If not, that's cool too, theres sites like Adam & Eve, Babeland, & Good Vibes just to name a few. Check em out:)

If you have any questions, shoot me an email AskMissSixxxty@yahoo.com
I'm always glad to help:)

For tonight's homework, I'm in a giving mood tonight:) I like keeping my men happy
ORAL THERAPY

Courtesy of SexInfo101.com.
This is perfect, he can rub my back or slap my ass...
But I prefer having my ass slapped...I'll do whatever to please you


Let me Hurry and finish this before I get sexually frustrated again.
Kisses:)
Miss Sixxxty, your very own freak of the industryy