Google Translate

Tuesday, January 24, 2012

"You Up?"

My nerves are completely fucking irked. This whole thing about initiating sex just has my spirit disturbed. I think we can all agree that at any given moment I'm prolly thinking about sex. Whether I'm in class, the grocery store, or in church I'm thinking about penis. That being said, the whole "Closed mouths don't get fed" rule clearly doesn't apply to me. Why? I have no fucking idea. I always thought in a man's perfect world they'd have a bad bitch who wanted to have sex ALL THE TIME and would happily oblige them when they asked. I would be that bitch. If the sex is good then you should already know you got me. I have yet to meet a man who wanted to have sex as much as I do (and if they did they weren't doin it with me:/). They make me feel like this sexual maniac, like something must be wrong with me if none of these dudes want it like I do. In MY perfect world I would have access to the dick whenever the fuck I asked, at least once a day. Don't care when, don't care where, don't care how just give me the shit.
This leads me to the issue at hand. I know I obviously can't hit up any dude EVERY TIME I wanna have sex, this I know. But those rare few occasions I DO try to initiate something they mistake my wanting sex for catching feelings. Or some other bullshit. Listen. Sir. I'm not trying to date you, I'm not trying to invite you to dinner and a movie I would just really like to borrow your penis for my personal enjoyment every now and then. Cool with you? And it ESPECIALFUCKINGLY irks me when I hit you up and you turn me down, I stop texting you and you hit me with the "I haven't heard from you in a while" well NO FUCKING SHIT SHERLOCK! Why would I continue to hit you up when you always turn me down?! It takes like twice for you to turn me down before I declare you a lost cause. The phone works both ways you know how o get in contact with me when you decide you're ready for me again...
Idk maybe I just have the world's worst timing and they'd actually like to have sex with me when I text but due to some prior obligations they can't. Or some shit. Who knows...
Is there some sort of protocol for proper waiting time before I get to try to initiate the shit and get mine? No? This is why I propose the emoji developers come up with a single emoji that would signify that I would like to bang the shit out of you I could initiate sooooo many more booty calls with that. So simplistic, yet it would get the job done. Apple where's my check?!
So yes. For those of you I get textually active with, when you don't hear from me for a few days its not because I'm tryin to play it cool. I'm doing it so you don't think I'm starting to have feelings for you. The only feelings I'm having for you are deep in the pits of my vag. If you can help me out with that then fanfuckingtastic. If not, then why the fuck are you even texting me in the first place??
YES. If we just FUCK, don't text me just wanting to talk. It's annoying.
...Why is it so hard to find a fuck buddy who just wants to have sex all the time? I'm convinced I'm a scientific anomaly...Whatever I'll just go back to being sexually frustrated until I get to cash in my rain check...if that ever happens...

Miss Sixxxty, Your very own freak of the industryy

No comments:

Post a Comment