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Sunday, June 6, 2010

Let's Talk About Anal.

I couldn't come up with any clever, cutesy name for this blog.
Because that's just it.
Anal isn't cutesy.
It deals with quite possibly the dirtiest part of your body (depending on your hygiene).
But I have come to learn that, done properly, its FAB.
Thought I'd start off with a story about The Big Carl and I.

This was our second meeting. After only one round I was ADDICTED.
So when he texted me and asked if I would come over, I had to weasel 5 bucks from my mom so I'd have enough gas to get over there lol. (Thank god I found a better paying job)
I arrive @ his townhouse and its eerily quiet.
That's because the PG&E got shut off. (The Big Carl only had sex once with the lights on. For the next 2 months the electricity was off lol)
I walk to his room and this loser is sitting in the dark bathroom and he's like "come here". So he shuts the door and we're in pitch blackness. I can't see shit.
Then he starts rubbing my thighs, comes up behind me, and finds my neck with his lips.
So I lean forward and press my ass into him and he yanks down my pants. I had gotten some sample lubes from this pleasure party a a few days earlier so I handed em over.
He stated "lube is for bitches" and emptied em out on my ass. Then he rubbered up, went inside, and started thrusting away.
At the same time he was giving meaning to the phrase "waxin' that ass". The combo was great. He'd rub an massage it while strokin, the lube was warming under his was AMAZEBALLS.
Then he slipped out and he tried to find his way in the dark. And he found his way to the back door.
I told you guys, TBC is not a thin man.
So he slowly eased in, and I let out a GASP. The kind that made me throw one leg on the counter top.
I compare the feeling to having my intestines ripped out through my ass.
Idk what even happened after that. Things were already pitch black, and taking him all in was too much.
I wasn't breathing because I was afraid I'd scream out in pain if I did.
Then he started massaging my ass and I relaxed for a bit.
Then things loosened up for a bit and I could actually enjoy it.
So while he was still inside we walked from the Bathroom to the bed and we finished the job there. It was incredible.
SIDE NOTE: I found out later he "claims" he didn't know he was in there until we left the bathroom O_o

So what words of wisdom can I offer you (for those who are willing to try, mind you)?
Well first and foremost TAKE A SHIT!
Thankfully I went to the bathroom before all this stuff went down so I had nothing to worry about. At least during the actual act.

Then you gotta be in a mindset for what you're about to do.
If your dude is a lil on the thin side, lucky you! You have it waaaay easier than a girl with a thick dude. Thin ones are just easier to take (for obvious reasons).

TIP: if your dude is a little on the thick side, you can invest in an anal plug to help stretch you out a bit. Or the free alternative; FINGERS. But remember shit comes out the dirtbox and noone wants their fingers smelling like shit from being in your booty for too long.
Anal feels waaay different from regular sex.
While most girls need some sort of clit stimulation during regular sex, anal has a whole different feeling (a good one). If you're dude is thin(er), or you think you're a sav an can take it all, i advise everyone to try it at least once.

BE PREPARED!!! after you have anal, your ass is gonna be kinda loose. I had to work immediately after this encounter, so even though i tried to walk as normal as possible, everyone knew what I had just been doing.
What accompanies the looseness? The ability to hold your farts in.
Nasty, yes. But true. But your muscles will eventually go back to normal in a few hours (or a few days, depending on how furiously y'all were gettin it in).
But we all know porn stars stick all kinds of crazy things up people's asses, and I don't hear anyone at the AVN Awards complaining that So-and-so can't control her gas. So no worries:)

This all being said, I enjoy anal, but I don't go asking dudes to fuck me in the ass.
If it happens without me passing out it happens lol

So I haven't left you guys with any homework in a while, I hope you're not mad at me:)

Courtesy of
Simple, and easy for those easing into anal. Also allows you to bite the pillow and muffle your moans (or screams) :)

Love you lots,
Miss Sixxxty, your very own freak of the industryy

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